Love’s Dance: Giving and Receiving
John 13:1–17, 31b–35

Our late spouses taught us much about love during their decade-long journey into the relentless losses of dementia. As brain diseases stripped them of self-sufficiency, resistance to being bathed became the norm. So, we understand Peter’s reluctance to have Jesus wash his feet.

Love in the form of giving care is sometimes easier than receiving care. Caring for the needs of the resistant frail can be messy, frustrating, and scary. Receiving care from another can be threatening as control is lost and self-sufficiency is relinquished.

Love is a dance. Sometimes we lead and other times we follow. Sometimes we lift and other times we are lifted. Discipleship is sharing in the Triune God’s dance of love and participating in the never-ending flow of divine love.

Our spouses, Dale and Linda, expanded our capacity to love without reciprocity by receiving our care. Washing their increasingly frail bodies, brushing their tangled hair, feeding them their favorite ice cream, even when they resisted, increased our capacity to love. By receiving our care, they fostered in us the “fruit of the Spirit”—love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, gentleness, and self-control (Gal. 5:22-23).

Jesus gathered with his closest friends on the night before his betrayal, arrest, trial, and crucifixion. Soon he would be stripped of his freedom and control and nailed to a cross. The one who had insisted on washing the disciples’ feet in a humble act of loving service would be dependent on the care of others.

After washing the disciples’ feet, Jesus left them/us with this one commandment: “Love one another as I have loved you.” In following his example and commandment, we participate in the eternal flow of God’s steadfast love.

Reflection: How has your capacity to love been expanded in the giving and receiving of care?